Many of you have reached out to thank me for being transparent through this mess. Honestly, being open about the details of Julian's death has been healthy for me. It's painful to retell the story over and over but being willing to share the truth removes the questions people are afraid to ask and the awkwardness of the unknown. It allows people in. We know we can't do this alone. This whole thing SUCKS but what doesn't suck is the support we have received every single day since that awful afternoon, and the willingness of friends and family to care for us and mourn with us.

 

We mourn the loss of our perfect family that we prayed years for. We mourn that Christmas cards and family albums will be painful every year from here on out. We mourn all the dreams we had for Julian's future (he always wanted a large family and to adopt).

 

But God has other plans for us and though that's one tough pill to swallow, we submit and are thankful that His plans are better than ours.

 

We had three photographers at Julian's service. If nothing else, I practice what I preach about the importance of documenting life (and death in this situation). I don't plan to stop documenting my family even though our sweet boy isn't here. There is nothing to hide and Noy and I want to remember the bad with the good because this is the road God has us on.

 

Our longtime friend and family photographer, John Miller photographed the last photos I posted of Julian's service. We were so thankful his shoot that day got postponed and he was able to be there for us.

 

My friend Nicole Dina is an amazing family photographer in Parker and she dropped everything to come photograph Julian's service for us and brought along Sara Garcia, who is another amazing, local photographer who I've never met in person. Sara put together this beautiful video for us.

 

There's so many people to thank for making that day a beautiful memorial to Julian. I am trying to slowly write some thank-you's but know that if you don't receive one, it's not because we aren't grateful. We truly are and we pray God blesses you ten-fold for the sacrifice of your time, talents, meals, money, all the things!

 

Thank you for following along and choosing to walk with us on our path of sorrow. We are thankful to have you beside us and Christ as our guide.

 

xo

 

“You do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away” (James 4:14).